Okay, I realize that I probably sound really whiny and petty, but I really just need a place to rant and whine before I tear my friend's head off because she's making me feel really, really shitty at the moment and I know she doesn't mean to but don't actions speak louder than words and I really want to yell at her but instead I'm going to blog it because that's what the cool kids do. Woooah, run on sentence. I really don't want people to comment on how petty and moronic I'm being here, really I don't. I'm aware of it, which is why I'm blogging it rather than having a serious conversation with her about it. I just want to get it off my chest so I don't kill her on sight over petty things. Also, I'm blogging it on DA because I know she doesn't come here, in case you're wondering why it's not on some other blog site reknowned for its whiny bloggers. You've been warned.

Okay, so, as I mentioned, a certain friend of mine has been pissing me off lately. Let's just call her Connie. So, Connie and I go way back, to kindergarten in fact, but back then we weren't really close, we didn't get to be friends until about junior high or high school. She's about the only person from high school who went on to go to university with me, which is pretty cool.

Now, lately Connie has been treating me like shit(in my opinion). She has a job, so, okay, she is busy a lot of the time, so I don't call her up everyday and pester her. Because there's no school right now, she's working monday-friday, and sometimes saturday. But ever since school got out for winter break, she doesn't seem able to make any time whatsoever for me. I tried to make plans that worked around her work schedule, but everytime I tried she would say she was either working, or doing things with her family. Okay, i'll grant her that her family is in from out of town, but that was her excuse for two solid weeks. She can't take an hour out of that to maybe have coffee with me? Really.

She really pissed me off when she refused to go to my friend's Christmas party. He'd been planning it for weeks, and gave everybody tons of notice. He worked really hard getting everything ready, making a ton of food(okay, so mostly his mom did that, but we're kinda grateful for that) and decorating and everything. He even made sure it was after exams, just so that me and Connie could go, since we're the only ones of our friends who goes to the U. And Connie didn't have a good reason for not coming. Party was at 6:30, she only works til 4:00 at the latest(it's one of those 8:00-4:00 things, her hours don't change), and she did try to say she was working. Then she went on to say that she had to clean and decorate the house, and that they were also going out for dinner for her mom's birthday that night. Then, she finally used the excuse that she didn't want to go because her sister and her friends were going, when they weren't even invited(and no, they didn't wind up going).

Okay, to me, when a person give you a hundred reasons not to do something, they've been thinking about it too hard, which means that they're just making excuses because they don't want to go. This probably wouldn't have been nearly as bad as it was if she had just said that, but in the end, she decided not to go because she had to help her family decorate the house.

Okay, I get that decorating the house is something of a family tradition, but if she'd wanted to go, she could've gotten them to move it one day back. As it was, she wound up really hurting my friend's feelings, and now he really doesn't want a thing to do with her anymore, and neither do the rest of the people who came to the party, because they didn't really like her much to start with, but now this just made them hate her.

And then, after the party, we were trying to pick a day to get together. She had work pretty much every day, but she wanted to go for lunch on Christmas eve. I asked if we could maybe do dinner on the 22 or 23 instead, because my family generally does stuff together on the 24, but she was doing things with her family on both days, so I said okay, let's do it on the 24. The only day I would be doing things with my family, and I gave it up to hang out with her.

I figured things would get better after Christmas. But Connie had other ideas. I asked if she wanted to go shopping on the 27th, but no, more stuff with the relatives.

Today was the last straw for me. She sent me a text, asked if I wanted to help her out at a volunteering thing. I wasn't too interested in the volunteering, but I figured we'd finally get to hang out, so I agreed. Too late, apparently, because she'd decided to ask me and another of our friends, and then the other girl had gotten back to her first. Apparently Connie could only have one person helping her, so she told me too bad, and thanks anyways. That really pissed me off, that I had agreed to help her, and she decided to turn me down, after asking. I think that was spectacularly rude of her.

I'm having a little get-together on New Years Eve, just me and some of my closest friends, and I invited her. Last year she didn't come because she was playing poker with her family instead. If she doesn't come, I don't even know if I'll want to be friends with her anymore. She has to be willing to put something into this, she has to be willing to once in a while make room for me in her life. I'm tired of being a doormat, I'm tired of her refusing to spend two minutes trying to keep our friendship alive.

I make a lot of changes for her. She doesn't like one of my best friends, so I endeavor not to invite them to a lot of the same things, like shopping trips and movies and the like. This results in me spending a lot less time with this other friend, and that's a sacrifice I've made to be friends with Connie. But I really can't handle being the only one who tries here. If she doesn't at least make an effort, how can we be friends? I dunno. I just wanted to get that out.

I doubt anyone actually read this, but it makes me feel better to have written it all out. Thank you, to the infinite internets!